I feel like a big fat baby because I haven't stopped complaining for half a day now and, as much as I like to be a drama queen, this is getting to be a bit much.
The fibromyalgia seems to be back. With a vengeance. Perhaps my body has adjusted to the increased progesterone and it no longer acts as a balm for muscle regeneration and sleep. Or perhaps the baby is growing and pressing on nerves in my back or something and this is totally separate from my usual fibro pain. Whatever it is, it hurts. I have the fibro bruised-feet feeling at least once a day. Joints feel stuck. My legs sometimes feel tingly like they are asleep when I walk to work. But the really bad thing is the pain radiating out from my tailbone into my hips. This whole issue has a hint of sciatica about it, but actually fits the definitions of pelvic girdle pain a bit more. It seems I have to do kegels and perhaps some other exercise to help it, although it also says not to do anything that hurts. So I'm not sure how to work all that out.
My blood results came in, though I don't really know much about them and probably won't bother to call. I got a message from my doctor on Friday saying that the results were "great" and she told me that my Down's risk was 1/1700. That's halved from the normal risk of my age. While that is "great," it actually makes me more solid in my decision to have the amnio, as it is very close to the 1/1600 or so risk that they now quote for miscarriage from amnio. I would be having the amnio no matter what, but this makes me feel more secure in the decision. It is a great result, but not great enough for me. I don't think any result would be. Others who have had the nuchal stuff - do they give you your risks for some of the other stuff, too? I will look into my other results when I see my doctor in 2.5 weeks. Like I said, they don't matter much. Mostly, I had the nuchal so they could rush me to a CVS if necessary. I am glad it wasn't.
We had a lovely weekend spending long blocks of time doing necessary errands like grocery shopping and looking at kitchen appliances at Lowe's. That sounds like I am being facetious, but I'm not. Sometimes it is just amazingly wonderful to spend time with Wes and Wes alone and I will risk sounding like an utter sap to say that it is truly glorious to be married to someone you love more and more every year, month, week, day.
Of course, by the end of the day I was in the excruciating tailbone pain and having to sit down every 3 minutes while trying to make dinner and screaming like a freak as I tried to bend over to help make the bed, and then moaning like a cow as I tried to find a position that didn't hurt so that I could sleep. It's like my tailbone and hips are just incredibly tight and nothing can make the tight pain stop.
All I ask is that this not be a permanent, next-6-months sort of thing. Some of my reading says it can last at least 12 weeks past baby's arrival, and with fibro I have a feeling that could stretch further. It is worrisome, but there is very little to be done about it, beyond exercises that I know I will do in a half-assed way because they will hurt and I will hate them, so I am trying to take it one day at a time. Much like my constant anxiety and worry about something being wrong in general. TK was alive as of Saturday morning. I am actually becoming less worried about spontaneous death and much more worried about the possibility of bad amnio results. I honestly can't wait for that whole thing to be over. The other development in the world of my over-the-top worries is a semi-daily fear that I will die in childbirth. It has become a pathetic, mournful refrain in our house, "Weeeeesssss, what if I diiiiiiiee?" Yeah. Not much to say about that.





